february 14th. how has this day come to be such a polarizing day? women yearn for tokens of affection while men cringe at the very thought.
valentine’s day is the final obstacle of the winter love tunnel. every new couple is challenged by this journey if they are dating any time after halloween and before martin luther king day. winter what? yeah, i just made it up. let me explain…
a man and woman enter the tunnel at thanksgiving. here you are still guided by the light behind you and there’s very little pressure. if either wants to turn back, do it now! but if you’re going to give it a try, a simple call, text or “happy turkey day!” at the end of an email is enough to get you through this stage. the least romantic and most fattening of holidays, a new couple can easily get through it with modest expectations.
the next milestone is christmas. this one is also rather inocuous for a new couple. people have traditions and shouldn’t be expected to alter them after one or two months. still, some type of acknowledgement of one another should take place. gift giving is dependent on the seriousness of the relationship and the economy. christmas is important because you get a read on what the other person values. be weary of statements like “i don’t celebrate holidays”. participating in any group activity during this time is celebrating the holidays no matter what your faith. and you best believe, he (or she) will be at someone’s dinner table christmas eve and giving mom and sis a gift.
next up- new years. this is big. a joint celebration is almost unavoidable depending on how long you’ve been dating. barring a pre-planned out of town trip or mobs of friends that run in different circles, for those 18 and older, new years is for lovers. making plans, even to watch dick clark should be made jointly.
the ball drops. it’s a new year. a new you. what’s next? are you ready for some football? the super bowl. no longer only a man’s game and the commercials aren’t always all that good, the super bowl is an unofficial american holiday. whether you’re going to a big party or keeping it low key, you don’t spend those 4 hours with someone you DON’T like and if you do like someone you’ll want to watch the play by play with them. for guys, it may be all about a good football game, but a good number of women (no, not all) go to super bowl parties because of the large concentration of men. if your new beau insists on watching the game alone, beware… i’m just sayin….
and then we get to valentine’s day. tradition teaches us that on this day a fella is supposed to do something romantic for his gal. however, tradition is not reality. and i think we all know that v-day is a fun opportunity to let people know you care about them. but that doesn’t mean it should be dismissed completely. i hear a lot of guys say they don’t “do” valentine’s day and why do they have to show their affection on this particular day. well, you don’t HAVE to do anything, but would it kill you to send a text? chances are, these same guys DON’T do anything on the other 364 days of the year either. because if they did, it wouldn’t be such a big deal to do something nice on 2/14. and think about it guys, any other day she might mistake your efforts for guilt. but on valentine’s day 1) every establishment offers a ready-made date, no planning needed 2)you score points for doing anything at all.
do you see that? that bright light? that’s it. you’ve made it to the other side. it’s the end of the tunnel! you’re home free until that first memorial day cookout. after that you may get snagged by vacation temptation and a summer fling, but cross that bridge when you get to it. for now, bask in the glory of love. fellas – you know how to make a woman happy. and ladies – relish in the fact that you weren’t pathetic and lonely this year. yeah! (cue jersey shore fist pump)
so how many couples will make it through the winter love tunnel. who can successfully navigate a new relationship through the many hurdles of romantic expectations? we won’t know for sure until february 15th, but read part 2 for a classic tale of v-day gone wrong…